I’ve done it all. I’ve counted points. I’ve counted calories. I’ve been on at least twenty five “kicks” on my life. I’ve deprived. I’ve told myself to be better, to be stronger, to kick my ass into gear. I’ve berated myself for being unable to do so. I thought for the longest time there was something wrong with me. When I was blackmailing myself with eventual acceptance, I remained between thirty and fifty pounds heavier than when I ditched it all. Now, as a health coach, and on the other side of this battle in a very zen and accepting place with my body, it seriously pains me to see articles toting “calorie in and calorie out” deprivation and dieting.
It KILLS me (I actually need to walk it off) because I know it is setting people up for more pain, more frustration, more confusion and with less money in their pockets. All in the pursuit of what will only put a band-aid on the problem. It gets me all riled up because I know that most people coming to me have an incredible amount of drive and strength, and that they have been misled. Not only have they been misled but they have developed habits that actually sabotage the results they are most wanting. They are doing their best and still not getting the results they want, which leaves them feeling hopeless, like a failure, and believing in themselves a hell of a lot less. As a coach, I know this whole shebang is about a lot more than calories. I know that WHY you do WHAT you do gives us a LOT more information to work with than what you are doing, and that investigating that is one of the surest ways to create sustainable change. It is never the food. Rather it is the relationship we have with food and how we use it. It is never our body. It is our relationship with our body and how we unwittingly abuse it. It is never the thing! It is our RELATIONSHIP with the thing that we need to examine to create real behavior change.
Take a few minutes to watch my video this week to see how (even if you have the best intentions), you may be standing in your own way and creating the constant roller-coaster of up and down. It is almost five minutes but I urge you to watch all the way through until the very end because until you are able to master this, results will remain temporary and feeling good about yourself will remain painfully elusive. If you can master it, your body will show up for you in a totally new way. And join in the conversation! Leave your comments below so we can start a dialogue together.